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Browsing Tag: husband

A Kind of Thank You

Today is Cian’s first day of kindergarten. For the first time in ten and a half years, I am alone, left to my own devices, free to use these morning hours for all of the writing work (two books! already started!) I’ve been waiting to do, waiting to concentrate on, waiting to finish, for most of the working day. It’s a whole new world out here, you guys, and boy, is it quiet. But, dear reader, this post isn’t about Cian–he was so ready to go, and that kind of happy knowledge overshadows the fact that his goodbye wave at school was more of a “please leave because I have very, very important things to do” shrug. It’s not about me, either, who’s feeling pretty darned proud of herself for not collapsing into a big snotty puddle of sobs the instant he turned away from us. This post? It’s about David. See, here’s the thing about my husband: he carries the financial weight of our family on his back, and does so with so much grace it’s easy…

No Matter What

All of our biggest conversations happen in the car. We were on our way to gymnastics, deep into a Depeche Mode song, when Quinlan asked me to revisit a story I’d once mentioned about a boyfriend I’d had when I was younger. “Mom? Did he throw you into the lake?” It took me a moment before I realized what she was talking about, then immediately swore to always downplay any single story I told her again from there on out. “No, no, honey. That boy never THREW me into a lake. We were in a canoe on a lake, and he was teasing me by rocking the boat over the deep water.” “And that’s why he didn’t become your boyfriend anymore?” “Well, not because of just that. But I was upset because he knew I was scared. But there were more moments after that when…” I couldn’t think of a way to explain it. “He wasn’t mean. I just started to feel bad about myself when I was around him. Like, sad.” She seemed to understand what I was saying. “So I knew it was time for him to not be my boyfriend…

Perspective

Glass half empty: Woke up late. Spent way too much time on the ol’ phone before I even got out of bed (I know. Step Two. I know.). Threw a bagel at the kids for breakfast, left all dishes behind on table/countertops. Kids had a two-hour delay today after two days off school for snow, AND YET they were doing their homework and going through backpacks a half hour before we had to leave. I know. Got showered, dressed, ready. Mascara and lipstick applied. Then got to the school with David for a meeting…only to find out from the other parents that the meeting had been postponed. Did either of us see said email or text alerting us to this? No. Nope, no. I have no idea if we put the dog in her crate or not before we left. The fate of our furniture and the kids’ toys lies in the difference. Glass half full: Both David and I had our laptops with us when we left the house this morning. At his suggestion, we are now tucked into a two-top at a little indie coffeeshop one town over. He is working…