April 18, 2018

Ten Years

Yesterday marked the 10th anniversary of the day pancreatic cancer took my dad. It’s a marker I’ve thought about since the very beginning: where would we be at ten years? What would he have missed in that much time? What would we have missed? My dad is as real to me today as he was then. In all unembarrassed honesty, I miss him so much my chest aches. The death of a parent before anybody is ready creates this weird sort of outline where the person should be standing in your life. The outline of that lost person never goes away: it might fade, it might lose its edges a bit now and again, but it’s always there. Every dinner, every holiday, every milestone: the outline, standing there, empty where it should’ve been whole. I missed David’s dad’s anniversary a couple weeks ago (Yes, I just switched gears and mentioned David’s dad. April is a FUN month for our household). His was 9 years, and I hadn’t updated my calendar yet, and the day came and went until the evening, when David mentioned it…

The Best Strawberry Shortcake Cupcakes

David turned Still Younger Than I Am last month, and he requested strawberry shortcake for dessert, but not actually a cake, but maybe cupcakes, or something like cupcakes, he said. He’s so lucky I can speak David. I went with strawberry shortcake cupcakes, which was the best decision I’ve made in a really long time, and–if you make these for yourself, which you should, right now–you’ll see what what I mean. I have absolutely no good pictures of these cupcakes because I didn’t think about it until the nighttime, and our kitchen has terrible light. If I were smart, I’d have waited till daylight to grab a photo of one of them for you, but, um, my supply had greatly dwindled by then. It had dwindled into my stomach, if you know what I mean. These cupcakes are delicious, so ignore the picture and just trust me. I found the recipe on the site of a blog I really like, Sally’s Baking Addiction (anything I’ve ever made of Sally’s is guaranteed no-fail. It’s ridiculous in all the…